My Paper Heart x The All American Rejects

I don't know.
I mean... I should be happy, yes?
The ones I love sure are happy.
Everything right now... seems just perfect.
So, why do I feel so hollow?

I remember what Is said to me once,
"In order for the ones you love to be happy, sometimes you gotta sacrifice more than you're willing to."

And I remember disagreeing with him.
It just felt like that was one of the stupidest things that boy ever said to me.
I asked him why should I be the one sacrificing for the sake of seeing others happy... when I'm not.
Why should anyone have to sacrifice anything/anyone for the sake of everyone else?
And he said, I won't understand till it happened to me one day.
I remember how strongly I disagreed with him... and told him that I won't ever be one of those people who'd ever do that.
I'm my own person, no one has the right to influence my decisions whatsoever.

Yet, right now... I'm being a hypocrite to myself.

And at this very moment, I'm pretty sure Han would be messaging/calling me to ask what's going on after he reads this.
Don't be mad at me for feeling like this, love...
I'm not going back on my words.
I did this for us.





there's always some reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
oh, beautiful release
memory seep from my veins
let me be empty
or weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight