My Little Boifren...Killing Me x Cauterize
Raya this is year feels so different sey.
From the start of puasa...all the way till the 1st day of Aidilfitri...
The 1 month of fasting literally flashed past...I dunno bout you peeps.. but it felt soooo freaking fast sey. Before I knew it, it was the last day of puasa...and I fasted fer a WHOLE MONTH! Don't ask me why but my menses didnt come...haha...yes ar...
i'm not pregnant dammit.
Preparations for raya was made weeks before puasa. But, the tv had to break down, the washing machine had to leak, the light bulbs had to blow out, the computer had to crash... combo, I tell you.
My dad had to fork out quite a huge sum of cash to pay fer it all... but what to do... We don't have a choice ryte.
Breaking fast during the last day of puasa felt so weird...cos, we could go back as per normal the very next day. I just stared a lot at my food, thinking of what I have or haven't done during this whole 17 years of my life... I still have so much I have to accomplish... making my parents life easier and not put them through so much shit, ensuring that I secure a good education fer my OWN benefit and when my time in this face of the earth is over, I wanna die knowing that I did what I had to...
When I heard the takbir while breaking fast, I knew I was gonna cry...but I didn't wanna bawl front of my family members... the takbir always had this effect on me...it makes me reflect on ALL the shit I put the ones I care for through and all the things I should have done instead.
The first day of Raya...
The whole family was decked in BLUE!!!
New clothes,new shoes, new handbags...haha...gereks.
Then, it was the tym to get down and seek fer forgiveness from my parents.
Fer the first tym in months, I kissed my dad on both cheeks and he kissed my forehead... and I suddenly realised that,damn, this man is responsible fer all the fortunate things I have today...
And my mum just hugged me and didn't let go...she was already all emo and crying... telling me that she's sorry fer not being able to give me what I want and that now that I'm 17, she gives me the freedom to choose which is wrong and which ryte fer me... telling me that in a few years tym I'm gonna leave her and set up my own family.
Sentimental lyk hell lar...but it happens once a year... so yeah, let it be.
Went to my maternal grandma's place. Everybody was there... and when I stood at the front door, no one recognised me... they stared at me and my grandfather even asked " Ni sape plak ni?"..meaning.."Now, who are you?".
WTH...and I said ar..." Shikin lar, tok!"...and he looked so effing shocked...!! He said, " Ya Allah! Da anak dara cucu aku ni...tak lamer lagi nanti dapat la kad jemputan dari kau eh..."
-__-'''
Ok, after all that madness..wanted to go to my fraternal's grandmother's house... Kissed my grandma on the cheek and she just hugged me and kissed my forehead...seriously ar, the kiss of a grandma feels so.... great...and I dunno why...but I have a feeling I won't see her next year anymore...like...its her last...cos she's old and sick already...haish.
At my fraternal grandma's place, same thing again...
My grandma didn't recognise me la sial...i was standing in front of her and she was staring at me like she dunno who the eff I am..haha..then I said la.. " Nek, ni Shikin la...".. and she said I looked soooo different...
What's soooo different saks!??They saw me when we gathered to break fast as a family!And that was lyk...only 2 weeks ago?!
Woots...so, met up with the rest of my couzies and we went visiting as one biggg group. 7 families with 4 -5 members in each family.
Took public transport and there was so many people decked in baju kurungs...I love the feeling ar...
*can't wait to go jalan raya with my peeps...camwhores at work...and confirm kecoh giler nye.
Slamat Hari Raye yar people... i'm outta here..
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